When my parents died a few years ago and left me everything I thought I’d do my friend from high school a favor and have him move in with my rent free since he was living in a motel for the past 3 or 4 years. We rented an apartment in the past and I knew he was always kind of a slob (and a hoarder) but I never thought after 10 years he would still have this issue. My first mistake was not putting ANYTHING in writing. I figured as my best friend since 1989 it really wouldn’t need anything like that. Until I first noticed my car was quickly being filled with boxes filled with old phone books and old newspapers. Then the master bedroom started to look a bit cluttered. (Don’t ask me why I gave him the master bedroom rather than the guest room) At the same time he was buying brand new things like storage bins that he never use, instead he just piled more shit on top of the bins until they cracked. This is in the first month. Anytime something would break he would just leave it there and cover it up with more things. The only thing he never covered up was the sex toys and lubes he would leave out. And by lubes I mean Vaseline! But it wasn’t even brand name. Who the fuck uses generic Vaseline as LUBE? Sure we all have our shame toys and everyone wanks, but common sense tells us NOT to leave them out when finished with them. It didn’t stop there… All the people he brought over were all homeless. The shower turned black from mold, the closet doors are broken, there’s piles of dirt on the floor, bags of recycling that never seems to make to the recycling center and the room smells like a locker room. His BF steals my drugs and money. I’ve given him another “warning” to clean up but in actuality I’m going to wait until he has cleaned the room then kick him out for good.
Keep in mind this room was the same room that only a few years ago my parents died in. That room was their final resting place where I took care of them.
Ms and Mr. Little Piggy-Wiggy
Okay, so, How to start this story off…
My boyfriend and I had moved from his parents house into a different town, and location. With our three roommates (Now just one, but we have allot of roommates) Before we had moved into the house we are currently staying in, one of our roommates would let their dogs shit everywhere, punish them two hours later, complain that she can’t wash dishes because she needed gloves. Doesn’t clean after herself once she gets done cooking. She would take showers with her dogs, Gross! Who does that?! Her and her boyfriend would leave Three WEEK old dish in their bedroom and under their bed.
She would make these “Sounds” that an ANIME character would. She did this on a daily basis. Hell, she makes baby noises when they are having sex (Mind you, we could hear them clear as day). She ate a WHOLE entire pizza by herself, high jack my drink (Though I do this to my bff though its different) and drink half of it and only leave me just a few sips left…Thanks bitch. She would complain how dirty the house was and how MY cat was missing the litter box and be shitting on the tile in the bathroom while her dogs shit EVERYWHERE.
Once we had moved into our house we are living in, we would come home from work and she would be complain how her feet hurt, how tired she was, how she can’t run because of her ankles…Bitch was to fucking fat to run, now I know that was mean to say, but by God she was to fat to even run to save herself. She had left her room a mess, to where you can’t even walk in! Once, when we looked at the house, she wanted the bigger bedroom because of the bed, saying she had a bad back. While my boyfriend had a fucked up back, it’s not alined right I do forgot what it was called. Scoliosis or something like it. Her and her boyfriend would complain about the smell of pot that we smoke upstairs and how it leads down stairs. They complain how we don’t invite them to anything, when we would throw a beer party. They eat everything in the house, use all of the TP and paper towels.
Now remember what I said about how she needed to use gloves for dishes? Well she did them once,… only half of them and asked ME to do the rest because her feet were hurting. She has to sit every time we go somewhere. She had started pacing up their shit, or should I say made her boyfriends brother and sister pack up her shit for her. And she would sit on the bed, demanding them to put shit in shit and what not. She had the nerve to ask me not to tell anyone that they were moving, while it was obvious that their shit was gone… Once, she had asked me if I needed anything and I said “Yea, a toothbrush.” so, she bought one, and asked me to have it and gave me hers… of course me not wanting to be a bitch said sure…all because the fucking toothbrush was her favorite color. They would leave trash every where not do a damn thing about cleaning, just watch people do it, and when they do clean they expect someone to do the dishes, because they wiped and swept and taken out the trash. Lazy ass people I’m glad they are gone, were still trying to get the smell of rotten pussy and ass with a hit of sweaty balls out of the room they were in.
The Collector
We didn’t notice roommate’s hoarding problem right away because she has, by far, the largest room. She subtly ‘contributed’ furniture to the household. Bookcases, end tables (5 of them!) an old desk. Then stored excess stuff from her bedroom on and in these items. Before long her collections dominated the house and her argument was that the stuff and furniture belonged to her and she could do what she pleased…even the 6 months worth of magazines she never read were not to be touched on ‘her’ coffee table or she’d throw a tantrum like a child. Seeing that she’s 25 years old I was not about to coddle her. I explained that I pay 1/3 of the rent and would like to have use of one third the space. Expectantly she said I couldn’t use her stuff and with second roomie’s backup we told her to take her shit out of the common area if she doesn’t want it used by anyone. We all know damn well it all wont fit in her room. She allowed us to clean the common room of her debris in exchange for allowing her to have two giant bookcases full of her stuff in there. The cases are an eyesore but apparently not the worst we have to endure, girl smells. I share a wall with the bathroom so I know she’s bathing every 1 to 2 but I also share a wall with the laundry and I’ve never seen her bedding washed. Let alone her curtains or window open. The smell is stale sweat and it is so bad it’s began to waft into the hall outside her door…which is right in front of the entrance. Just hits you when you walk in, I’m embarassed to have people over. Other roommate just walks guests straight to her bedroom to avoid the psycho’s clutter and stench.
Princess Nightmare In the Kitchen
I live in a four bedroom house, but after our 4th left we had an empty room. Come november, one roommate suggested a friend of his to live with us because she didn’t like living all alone and it lowers our rent to have all rooms filled. This girl started off polite, she too enjoys baking and claims to keep the kitchen clean. Fast forward five months, she has become “paleo” a diet where she cooks all her own food from fresh supplies and doesn’t clean up after herself. She makes eggs and bacon for breakfast very morning and leaves her dishes in the sink all the time. (I’ll add, I got food poisoning from bacon when I was a child and the smell makes me sick) She cooks more elaborate dinners that take hours of prep time, but can’t take the time to wash the stupid dishes. We don’t have a garbage disposal in the house either, and she consistently leaves food in the trap. Its gotten so bad that the sink smells rancid and our friends don’t like coming over. Because I can’t live with her again we’ve started the search for her replacement and she has refused to let us show her bedroom even though the landlord has claimed 24 hours notice is sufficient to show the room. I’ve cleaned the kitchen everyday for the past three days and everyday I get home from school and the counters and stove are a mess again. She has contacted the landlord about getting out of her lease early and moving out next month because she feels she can have whatever she wants, and her mother just bails her out of everything. The funniest part is that she wound up in that apartment alone because she couldn’t get along with her first roommate of college.
Fat and lazy spoiled brat…
Me and my roommate…get…along…in most cases. If I wasn’t her roommate, I’d like her…
I’ve lived with her for about only seven months, and let’s just say, I hate that this is my first college experience.
When I first moved into dorms on the college campus, I was place into community housing because all of the dorm “apartments” (in all simplicity that’s what they were…) were all full…I had another roommate who was a partier…She stayed out all night, came home three in the morning, slamming doors, and turning on all the lights in the room…That’s where I met Danielle, my current roommate…She hadn’t had her roommate come, since by the move in date she decided that she wanted an apartment off campus. I started hanging out with Danielle and liked her. I spent most of my nights in her room and I’d return to mine to sleep. We all got an email that said the housing office still had rooms available and we could meet with them. That is how Danielle and I became roommates…
I went to talk to the housing and they gave us a room, or rather an efficiency, that was only to house one person but they could move to beds into. It doesn’t have rooms, it has a living room, kitchen and bathroom…we use the couch to separate the sides of the room…let’s just say, it was way better than community housing…so I thought…
I never had a problem with her until I learned her ways…she was the baby of the family…spoiled rotten, never did anything for herself…so really I’m the maid, taking out trash, doing dishes constantly, and unclogging the toilet…while she sits around…eating…all the time.
Danielle is a good person, she doesn’t realize she does it…and that’s the problem…I’m too nice to tell her off…I live with her, I don’t want things to get sour…but right now, listening to her snoring, not because she can’t breathe through her nasal passages…because she is so fat she literally is crushing herself…she’s nasty, her feet always stink and she leaves her underwear on the floor, which is the side we keep the TV and everything on…and is also the first thing you see walking into the dorm room…my friends don’t come over because of the smell of her dirty clothes, and because that side is so messy you can’t really hang out…
Tomorrow we have inspection and that is the only time she has cleaned….all last week I cleaned the whole house and today she complained to me because I went to my friend’s house to help her with something. She only complained because I wasn’t there cleaning. I told her I cleaned all day prior…it was her turn. And I was surprised she actually did it. First time ever my side has looked messier than hers…and it’s the boxes I’m putting into my car before the inspection…
She also eats all of my food before I can get a little bit…I may offer you to have some, it doesn’t mean you eat all of it…I got some actual homemade food from my boyfriend…I told her she could have a little bit, guess what she does, take most of everything out…He made it so I could take it home and freeze it…I hadn’t had any of it…and it’s my favorite food he makes…she also takes all my waters, and says she’s buying the next batch, but by the time I’m done waiting for her to, I do it out of desperation…the water here has an advisory, we can’t drink tap even with a filter….which sucks…
If we had separate rooms I wouldn’t have to deal with her…She likes to tell me lies to try and impress me, like, “All my teachers in Highschool loved me so much.” or, “My dad is planning to get me a brand new Nissan Altima. And he’s gonna pay for the insurance too!”
I hear a lot about how her family loves her so much…and I think it’s because two weeks before school I was having drama caused by my mother, who kicked me out…which has depressed me…I have always had mom drama, but what sucks is if I try to talk to her about it, she tells me that my problems aren’t as rough as hers…she’s not working, and she’s getting a free ride through college…I’m having financial problems, and am gonna have to quit school for a year, because of the debt I’m in…I’ve told her and she kinda likes to rub in my face that I, “apparently didn’t try hard enough.” (her words)
She’s rude, lazy and I really can’t wait to have this semester over with…I sometimes feel like she’s my younger sister and I need a break from watching her…and trust me, my 8 year old sister is so much better than her, and I have problems with my sister…
I know there are worse people out there to live with….that I am grateful not to have…but this as a first year experience…has totally ruined my prospective on having a college roommate…
The Habitual Liar, Thief and Bitch
I swear I attract the worst people to live with, and I have thought maybe it’s me but it’s really not. So this girl is all around a filthy, immature, evil dirty little bitch. She purposely pees everywhere, steals, has her boyfriend come over to steal, and creates a mess just b/c she knows it will piss me off. She really thinks other people are supposed to pick up and clean up after her, and if you ask her to do it she will get mad.
Like how dare I ask you to clean your own mess so I don’t have to live in filth?? First of all I shouldn’t have to ask anyone. Yet she continues to create drama and a mess just so she can walk around with a smirk on her face knowing I’m mad about it. Unfortunately, we live in the dorms so there’s nothing anyone can do really besides kick her out and she refused to show up to any of the meetings in fear she will be kicked out. I just can’t wait to finally get my own space and never speak to this girl again. I’ve known her since grade school and I did feel like it was a bit of a bad idea to live with her, but I was really desperate and in a bad situation. Therefore she was my own option, and I cannot regret that more. She’s one of those people who walk around thinking they’re owed everything in life and do not have to work for anything when they can lie and steal. For all of you that have good roommates, consider yourself blessed or lucky. Not all of us get to have that! 🙂
Crazy Horder
Me and my boyfriend knew a girl who was moving out of her apartment, after being cheated on and we thought it would be nice to help her out for a few months.
Soon after the problems started. I shall call her MP. Now our apartment is not small at all, but with two peoples stuff already in it, there was not a lot of room left. I thought MP would just bring food and stuff for her bedroom. I was very wrong. MP crams as much stuff as possible into her room and our kitchen. We honestly have no room for any food in the fridge.
Now a year later, she has stopped paying us rent on time, and this last month she didn’t at all. We decided to evict her, but that didn’t go very well. Come trying to kick her out, she scream and rages psychotically saying that she will take us to court if we don’t let her stay till the end of the month. We gave her that, but shut off almost all the amenities to the apartment. Just a few more weeks left and MP will be gone, and will thankfully be our last roommate ever.
We had a yeller
I’ve had about a dozen roommates, and have been exceedingly lucky with them. I’ve only had 2 bad ones. One was a 19-year old kid who worked a late shift and liked to party a lot since this was the first time he was out of the house. It was his place, so I just left. I actually liked the guy – he was really a good guy and with a great heart, but just couldn’t get enough sleep for my 9-5er.
The other one was a bear. I lived in a great place out in the boonies with a 360 degree view and a swimming pool. For a while, it was so ideal that I called it “Little Eden,” and couldn’t get enough of the place. I had a great roommate who was a super-cute and very cool 24-year old girl who was comfortable enough around me to go without clothes most of the time when the weather allowed. No problem by me…
However, we had one other room to rent. The landlord got desperate and tossed the first person in that could pay rent regularly. The new guy was a raging a-hole with the attitude and demeanor of a drill sergeant. Even though I’m very easy going, get along with everyone, and can’t think of anyone else in the whole world that I dislike, I hated him.
The first bad thing was that my roommate covered up. No more nakedness. Ug… Unfortunate, but expected around some new guy. Then, he started to fall for the 24-year old, even though he was in his early 50s and she had a boyfriend. I think that is why he had it out for me, even though I didn’t have it out for him, nor did I ever even think of dating the 24-year old.
He was OCD and had a violent streak that came out every now and then. One incident was when he thought I left out some towels to dry by the pool. It didn’t matter or make him stop yelling at me for leaving a mess after he learned that it was actually the 24-year old girl’s towels and not mine – he had it out for me and he couldn’t be stopped.
I couldn’t reason with him ever. I walked out of arguments almost daily. The straw that broke the camels back: less then a thimbleful of salsa in the sink that called a “mess.” That was it – nothing else. I had no problems cleaning up my “mess,” but I was still eating and had my quesadilla still in my hand as he screamed at me.
I stayed until my month’s rent was up, then I left. Just thinking of that jerk still gives me a pit in my stomach.
I ran into him randomly several months after I left. He said he moved out because the 24 year old made too much noise while having sex with her boyfriend. Then he said something like “I didn’t like how it turned out between the two of us, but you always left out a mess and you left your shit out on the porch all the time…” He kept rattling off a few other complaints to me. It was that moment that any last, tiny, lingering, little doubts that I had about the possibility of him being a sane human evaporated. I turned and walked away from him mid-sentence. Asshole.
Couch peeier
My last roommate constantly had friends crash at our place. I would wake up early to go to work and have to crawl over bodies sleeping on my living room floor. They would usually be up until 5 am partying…which was lovely since I had to work in the morning.
The last straw was when one of her drunk friends crashed on the couch…and was so drunk he peed himself. He then tried to hide the fact by tucking the wet couch cover under and placing one of my blankets on top, which then got my blanket soaked in urine. Did he really think we wouldn’t notice? My couch was ruined and my roommate never gave me a cent to replace it. In fact, she didn’t even want me to say anything to her friend about the incident…cause she didn’t want him to be mad at her for bringing it up. Lovely! That is why I live alone now.
Man, I have so many crazy roommate stories. I could go on and on. I have had some good ones, but the bad ones really made me realize how the extra rent to live alone is so worth it.
“Chico”
Last year, “Chico” and I were barely a month into living in our (not-quite) 2-bedroom digs on Q Street when he sat me down one day for a little man-to-man chat. He proceeded to explain to me that the sober life just wasn’t for him and that he’d like to “drink socially”. Apparently, his problem was never alcohol, but crack cocaine…
Things proceeded from there. Despite what he had said about “not bringing it home”, there was a morning when I came downstairs and there was a guy I didn’t recognize passed out on the couch.
Then came the morning at 4:00 AM when I awoke to him banging on the front door smelling of booze and sporting an egg-sized lump on his face. He mumbled something about how he’d gotten “jumped”. So it was pretty obvious at that point that the “drinking socially” had become “smoking crack and god knows what else socially”.
Then he quit his job (or it quit him, who knows?) at some point and began spending most his time doing things not related to maintaining an income.
One day he called me at work. “You’re not gonna believe this,” he said. “Try me,” I replied. The power had been shut off at the apartment. The deal had been from the beginning that I would pay for cable and he would pay for power. Apparently, he hadn’t paid the power company a dime in the four months we’d been there. So, in what I knew was a huge gamble, I handed him $135 cash for “my half” of what was owed. The next day, he asked me for ANOTHER $135 — I didn’t give it to him. That night, with the power still not on, he muttered something vague about “Gotta go to Chico to get the money”.
I thought that Chico Einstein would at least be able to summon the wherewithal to get the power turned back on. Boy was I wrong. Because who needs air conditioning or even a fan in July in Sacramento…when you’ve got CRACK? So when it became apparent that the temperature was going to skyrocket and Genius had no intention of getting the power back on, I packed a bag and moved into a halfway house that a guy I knew ran. Hey — at least they had utilities. INCLUDING air conditioning!
Anyway, apparently the trip to “Chico to get that money” hadn’t been too successful, since in addition to not paying for power, Genius also didn’t pay his share of the rent for that month — $425. I found this out the same time that I found out that if I wanted the slumlords to give me any kind of good reference toward ANY future rental at all, I would have to come up with the money he didn’t pay, plus a full month’s additional rent, since they required 30 days’ notice for moving out. Plus, I thought that we paid first and last month’s rent when we moved in, but no. We paid first month’s rent plus a “security deposit”.
Anyway, total cost to me to be free of the situation — around $1100. If you count my share of the “deposit” that I’ll never see again (Chico was in jail last I heard), around $1500.